What if you’re not simply having a wonderful Christmas time? Or all you want for Christmas isn’t “you,” but some god damn alone time? During the holiday season, it’s impossible to escape the never-ending barrage of jolly, festive music. It can be torturous, but you can make the best of it with these Christmas songs that, somehow, don’t suck.
Heavy metal is the devil’s music, even during Christmastime! King Diamond made sure to give fans a holiday anti-anthem with “No Presents For Christmas.” Obviously a dude wearing corpse paint, inverted crosses and pentagrams won’t be high on Santa’s “nice” list, so it was generous of King to give us fellow heathens a track to receive coal to.
The world of punk rock has been inspired by Christmas in multiple ways. The legendary Ramones wrote the wonderfully sappy “Merry Christmas (I Don’t Want to Fight Tonight)” while hardcore legends FEAR took the alternate approach with “F—k Christmas.”
Each year, we wake up on Christmas morning disappointed that Corey Taylor isn’t under the Loudwire office tree, but the Slipknot vocalist’s holiday tune succeeds in soothing our pain. Christmas has always needed an anthem filled with four-letter words, booze and curmudgeonry, and CMFT delivered a gift that never stops giving with “X-M@$.”
Check out these 15 Rock + Metal Christmas Songs That Actually Don’t Suck in the gallery below.
15 Rock + Metal Christmas Songs That Actually Don’t Suck