May 31, 2023, 10:00am
According to the powers that be (er, apparently according to Dan Wickett of the Emerging Writers Network), May is Short Story Month. To celebrate, the Literary Hub staff will be recommending a single short story, free to read online, every (work) day of the month. Why not read along with us? Today, we recommend:
“The Dungeon Master” by Sam Lipsyte
A short story about an after school D&D game and the weirdos who gather to play it—what’s not to like? But whether or not you have any knowledge of owlbears (or bearowls, for that matter), Lipsyte manages to pull off an extremely good trick in these pages: he makes sure you’re having fun, the whole time, right up until he socks you in the stomach. Again: what’s not to like?
The story begins:
The Dungeon Master has detention. We wait at his house by the county road. The Dungeon Master’s little brother Marco puts out corn chips and orange soda.
Marco is a paladin. He fights for the glory of Christ. Marco has been many paladins since winter break. They are all named Valentine, and the Dungeon Master makes certain they die with the least possible amount of dignity.
It’s painful enough when he rolls the dice, announces that a drunken orc has unspooled some Valentine’s guts for sport. Worse are the silly accidents. One Valentine tripped on a floor plank and cracked his head on a mead bucket. He died of trauma in the stable.
“Take it!” the Dungeon Master said that time. Spit sprayed over the top of his laminated screen. “Eat your fate,” he said. “Your thread just got the snippo!”
The Dungeon Master has a secret language that we don’t quite understand. They say he’s been treated for it.